Domestic Violence and domestic abuse can affect you irrespective of your gender and age. You can be a victim of harassment and financial abuse (Goldsworthy and Raj, 2018) when going through separation even when your partner has never shown violent behavior previously.
Luckily, you can stop domestic violence by taking ACTION. You can easily obtain a protective order from the court (different legal names depending on where you live in Australia) and enforce the abusive partner to keep away from you.
Having combated the abuse, you have a chance to reclaim your happiness. You don’t have to live in the fear for the rest of your life. Here are things you can do and decision you can make to shape your future the way you want.
Tip 1: Decide On Where To Live In The Future
When you separate from your violent partner after psychological or physical abuse, you have to make some important decisions. One of the key decisions to make is to decide where to live in the future.
You have two options to consider:
- Sell the home (where you lived together) and reach a property settlement with your ex-partner through your family lawyer or domestic abuse solicitor.
- Stay in the same home
The decision to stay in the same home or sell it depends on how you work out your finances after separation. However, you may want to keep it merely for emotional reasons, taking the financial argument out of the picture.
If you are going to find a new home to live, be sure to find a place where you feel safe. If you have children in your care, you may consider moving to a location closer to their schools. You may have other things to consider before deciding on your future home, depending on your unique circumstances.
Whatever decision you make, remember it’s your decision. It doesn’t have to be influenced by your partner. This is now your life and you have to take control of it.
Tip 2: Open A Bank Account
You may have never considered this before leaving your partner. A lot of partners have joint bank accounts as they feel comfortable that way. But once you have separated, it’s your life and you are the only one responsible for it now. Without a bank account, you won’t find this modern life easy.
When opening an account, choose a bank that you like. Don’t just open the account in the bank where you had a joint account with your partner because you know the bank staff. Just go where YOU feel comfortable. Your decisions don’t have to be dependent on others anymore.
Tip 3: Block Your Communication With The Abuser
Unfortunately, domestic violence doesn’t end with separation. Sometimes, it continues beyond separation through phone and social media. To avoid further abuse, block the abuser on social media and call your telecommunication company for assistance with the phone. Only call when you have to make parenting arrangements.
Tip 4: Take Care Of Yourself
Take care of your own wellbeing. It’s the key to happiness and you need to unlock this door after separating from your violent partner.
When you take care of yourself, you regain your confidence. As you reclaim your identity and dignity, you will feel happier.
Tip 5: Reconnect With Your Old Friends
When you were in a violent relationship, you may have disconnected from some of your friends. After you have separated from the abuser, you will have time to rebuild your relationships. You should start by reconnecting with your friends that you rarely met during the time you were living with a partner.
Tip 6: Retain A Lawyer
One of the keys to reclaiming your happiness after domestic violence is to understand your legal rights and protect against any violence in the future. You may find it difficult to handle your aggressive partner. Moreover, being an outsider is a challenge when it comes to understanding the legal system.
A good domestic violence lawyer on the Gold coast or Brisbane will play an important role in settling down issues between you and your ex-partner after domestic violence. Additionally, he/she will protect your assets and make sure that settlements are in your and your children’s best interest.
Contact us at Collective Family Law Group – we are here to assist you.