In this episode of The Divorce Collective Podcast, Danielle Young—Senior Associate at Collective Family Law Group and accredited Family Dispute Resolution Practitioner—shares a practical communication tool to help manage post-separation conflict: the BIFF technique.
Developed by conflict resolution expert Bill Eddy, the BIFF method (Brief, Informative, Friendly, and Firm) is designed to reduce hostility and foster more constructive communication, especially in high-conflict situations like separation, co-parenting, and property negotiations.
What You’ll Learn
- What the BIFF technique is and why it’s effective in family law disputes
- How to apply each element—Brief, Informative, Friendly, Firm—in your own communication
- Practical examples of BIFF in action
- How this method supports cooperative co-parenting and helps avoid unnecessary disputes
- When to use the technique: emails, texts, verbal conversations, and legal correspondence
Danielle explains how emotions fuel conflict and how neutral, non-reactive communication can preserve your peace of mind and support your children’s well-being after separation.
Key Quote
“Conflict thrives on emotional responses. The BIFF method ensures your communication remains neutral and productive.” – Danielle Young
FAQs
1. What is the BIFF technique in family law?
The BIFF technique is a communication strategy designed to reduce conflict by keeping messages brief, informative, friendly, and firm.
2. Who developed the BIFF method?
Bill Eddy, a conflict resolution expert and co-founder of the High Conflict Institute.
3. Can BIFF be used in parenting communication?
Yes, it’s highly effective for managing co-parenting discussions, particularly when tensions are high.
4. Is BIFF suitable for property settlement negotiations?
Yes. Using BIFF helps keep discussions focused on facts and reduces the likelihood of emotional escalation.
5. How do I know if BIFF will work for me?
Try implementing the approach in one or two conversations. While it may not solve all issues, many separated parents find it beneficial.
If you need guidance on reducing conflict during separation, Collective Family Law Group offers mediation services and legal advice tailored to your situation. Book a family law consultation to get started.
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